Saturday, August 2, 2008

Missing You Like Crazy

I think that for me, being a stay-at-home mom makes it that much harder to be gone from my children. They are my world...spending 24/7 taking care of them makes them so. I survive the occasional {occasional & rare} day apart, but am always reunited at day's end. So couple this attachment {literally at the hip at times} to my children with my sentimental nature & tendency to cry at the drop of a hat and you can imagine what the last few days have been like as I prepare to leave for Nicaragua today.
Last night as I put the boys to bed, I was tucking them in and started to cry thinking about the fact that it is the last night I will tuck them in for several days. Then, as we prayed {Jason said the prayer because my crying would have inhibited me from doing so} I again was of course, as I mentioned, crying. And as I gave each of them one last goodnight kiss & hug, Cooper turned to me and said as he often does, "Your my best friend ever Mom," and inevitably, I cried. Don't worry, I saved the heavy crying for later as not to traumatize the children!
It's not that I don't know that I'm doing what the Lord has called me to do. It's not that I'm afraid they won't be well taken care of while I'm gone. It's not that I don't know that they'll be fine without me for a week. It's not that I don't know that this doesn't have to be such a sad event. It's just that for me, a stay-at-home mom to my three wonderful kids, it is.
And I just have to mention that I am NOT one of those overprotective moms who is uptight about everything and worries about all things concerning their children. But I am one of those moms that misses their kids when we're apart :)
So, I ask that you please pray for me, that I will be relying on the Lord's strength to lead me this week and to keep me focused on doing what He has called me to do. I will miss my kids like crazy, but I know that missing them for a week is worth what impacting even just one life with God's love & saving grace is worth!
Lastly, I just have to share one side story concerning how my mindset and the kids' mindset about being apart for the week is so not the same. Gabe was asking how long Jason & I would be gone on the mission trip. I told him 8 days. He replied, "Wow, I am gonna have 8 days of vacation? That's gonna be awesome Dude!" {Yes, one of his new favorite words is 'dude' - go figure!} So is he seeing this coming week as a vacation from his parents? I'm thinking so, that little stinker!

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